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Experts Warn of Threat From 100GigaBurger Bug
by Anonymous, via the Internet (of course)
Experts warned today of a new and deadly threat to our beleaguered
civilization: the 100GB Bug.
As most people know, McDonald's restaurant signs show the number of
hamburgers the giant chain has sold. That number now stands at 99 billion
burgers, or 99 Gigaburgers (GB). Within months or even weeks, that number
will roll over to 100GB. McDonald's signs, however, were designed years
ago, when the prospect of selling one hundred billion hamburgers seemed
unthinkably remote. So the signs have only two decimal places.
This means that, after the sale of the 100 billionth burger, McDonald's
signs will read "00 Billion Burgers Sold." This, experts predict, will
convince the public that, in over 30 years, no McDonald's hamburgers have ever in fact been
sold, causing a complete collapse of consumer confidence in McDonald's products.
The ensuing catastrophic drop in sales is seen as almost certain to force
the already-troubled company into bankruptcy. This, in turn, will push the
teetering American economy over the brink, which, finally, will complete
the total devastation of the global economy, ending civilization as we know it, and forcing
us all to live on beetles.
"The people who know--the sign-makers--are really scared of 100GB," one
expert said. "I don't know about you, but I'm digging up a copy of THE
FIELD GUIDE TO NORTH AMERICAN INSECTS and heading for the hills."
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